Saturday, January 30, 2010

"Forgiveness.....is more than saying sorry."

Isn't it though? I contemplate the concept of forgiveness at least once or twice a week. Why? I guess because it just becomes one of those complicated subjects that some people spend countless hours, minutes, seconds over analyzing. I happen to be one of those types of people that over analyze every little thing. At some point or another in our lives we run into certain events that take place that cause us to either forgive someone or someones for something they did to us or to perhaps someone close to us. But how exactly do we go about handling the forgiveness process?

For everyone it's different of course. I, for one, have a very hard time being able to move on past something that effects my day to day living. The concept of "forgive and forget" just doesn't go over very well with me. I remember EVERYTHING in extreme detail that has caused some sort of riff in my life and I have a very hard time being able to move past something. I guess for the most part, these things typically aren't something that can so easily be forgotten. It isn't that I don't want to be able to move forward....I do. I just am ashamed that I have become such a weak person that would rather curl up under a blanket and hide from the world instead of dealing with my "demons".  2009 was a rough year for me in more ways than I can count and the tough part is that I never saw any of it coming.

If time heals all wounds, then why months later do I find myself still hurting?

Thursday, January 28, 2010

To blog, or not to blog. That is the question.

I have debated now for quite sometime about whether or not to hop back onto the blogging bandwagon since abandoning my days of Xanga years and years ago. I write every single day most of the time in a journal. I have a very huge collection of journals that I have been writing in for the last twelve years of my life. Not really writing for any particular type of audience in mind, just something I have done for so long it has become a daily part of my life.

I see it as an outlet. A way to share my feelings, thoughts, ideas, etc. with the whoever is willing to listen....or in this case read. So I guess in a way this is my introduction blog. I am not exactly sure what my intentions behind this blog are or will become but for now I just know that it will be another outlet for my writing.

So, hello to the world of blogspot. Glad to be here!