Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Today just made my day....

To be told you're awesome at what you do is one of the best feelings in the world. I love my job and I love it even more when others can appreciate me for what I work so hard to do 5 days a week. This is one of my favorite animals I got to take care of since I've been at my current store.

My favorite part of the job is getting to deal with super cute critters like this little guy we had last summer. He was the sweeeetest baby bird and went home with a great family. This is just one of many reasons why I love coming to work everyday. :)

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

She & Him

I feel incredibly blessed with my life despite the bumps in the road I find myself presented with. I am getting better at learning from these "bumps" rather than dwelling on why they happened over and over again. Mac has really helped me realize this over the last 2 years of our relationship as a couple and our 6 year friendship. He puts up with every flaw and I'm ever so GRATEFUL to him for that. ;)

Thursday, April 22, 2010

I just love this.

I have been a fan of Kurt Halsey's work now for the last 6 or 7 years. I absolutely cannot help but smile really, really, really big at this piece! It is just too sweet. ; )


I have been doing a lot of self-reflection lately. I do this a LOT anyway but a lot more than normal. I have contemplated for years about what sort of field of writing I want to go into. (Hence, the reason for getting my degree in Journalism!) I can remember deciding when I was a young pre-teen that I wanted to write something someday that would help people, particularly, young girls and teens and all of the issues of self-esteem/self-image/etc. I have often worried that my writing wouldn't be good enough or maybe that people wouldn't be able to learn anything from it. (There I go again, doubting myself!) I guess I find myself doing this because I automatically assume that no one would want to read what I have to say. (Don't ask me why!?)

For the last 13 years, I have consistently written in a journal documenting my daily life. I even have two diaries from 4 years before that from when I was still in elementary school. I have written documentation of my life and not many people can say that they do. I have about 14 journals full of so many things that have happened to me. Especially, during my teenage/early adulthood years. Some of it I find HYSTERICALLY funny and some of it makes me bawl my eyes out. I always thought that one day I would do something with these journals and somehow turn them into an outlet for sharing my experiences with people going through/or have gone through similar things.

I find it to be a really scary thought as to how to go about putting a piece of my work out there for the world to see but I realize that in today's world it's MUCH easier to do with the help of the Internet. I bought a new journal last week to start re-writing about my past experiences and reflecting on how they have helped to shape me into the person that I am today. I wrote about ten pages just within 30 minutes. It's amazing how I can put a pen to paper like that and all the memories just start pouring out. The time period in my life I decided to write about was my first serious relationship in high school and the emotions just seemed to hit me all at once and it's been almost ten years since the relationship ended.

I am not saying that I had to undergo something different from anyone else but I guess my willingness to talk about it has changed a lot now that I'm 26 years old. Talking about the past for me has always been my own sort of personal therapy sessions. Even if I am writing it down in my daily personal journal. I am hashing out memories not to dwell on what happened to me, but to make light of how these situations impacted my life for the good and the bad. I'm ready to finally put my talent to good use. So here I go!

Until next time, my friends.

Saturday, April 17, 2010

Wine + Phineas and Ferb = my Saturday night in with the boyfriend

Monday, April 12, 2010

The flavor that keeps you guessing....

is a horribly disgusting idea. Flavor changing gum? Who came up with this shit? Someone at work gave me a piece to try a couple of weeks ago and it left the foulest taste in my mouth ever.

That is all.

A neverending battle......

My mom 9 out of 10 ten times treats me like her worst enemy. Menopause has not treated me well and I'm not the one going through it.

It's frustrating and hurtful and I am soooo tired of dealing with it.

She makes me feel like a 26 year old loser, even though I know that I'm not. Nice, isn't it?

She battles with me worse than she did when I was a teenager.

My 24 year old sister treats me basically the same way that my mom does. We basically have a non-existent relationship.

My dad, my boyfriend, my best friends are the only ones I can count on.

I want to hope I will wake up one day and it will all change. But I have been waiting this long and it has only gotten worse. I don't want to be one of the people that doesn't have a good relationship with their family. But it's steadily heading into that direction.

Talking about it with my mother = POINTLESS. She only nags at me on a daily basis to tell me that I have to fix my relationship with my sister but in reality my mom played a big role in putting the strain on the relationship in the first place. To the point where the two of them are best friends and I am just standing here in the shadows. I've gotten so used to being in the shadows for sooooo long that I almost don't even care.

Maybe one day I will care. But as each day passes, I just start to care less and LESS.

Sunday, April 11, 2010

Writer's block.

In attempt to cure both boredom and writer's block. I stole this from a fellow blogger.

Name the most terrifying moment of your life so far: I had just started driving and got into a pretty bad car accident where I over corrected myself and ended up flipping my parents' van onto it's side. The back window had to be busted out for me to get out. I have three scars on my right knee where I had to crawl through glass. Definitely, one of the scariest moments in my life.

If you could bring one character to life from your favorite book, who would it be? I really don't have any particular book I can pick as my absolute favorite so I really don't know!

If you wanted to look very sexy, how would you dress? I'm not a typical girl. Looking sexy isn't important to me at all. I dress up for ME not for my guy or anyone else. I feel the sexiest wearing a t-shirt and jeans. Seriously!

Who would you most like to be stuck in an elevator with? Least like? I would like to be stuck in an elevator with Conan O'Brien or Chelsea Handler. Um.....least, so many people I just don't like. Ha, ha.

Have you told your partner about all of your past relationships? Mac and I were friends before we were a couple and we knew a lot about each other's past relationships already before getting together. I have nothing to hide.

What outfit or article of clothing do you like to see your spouse wearing the most? My guy dresses super nice and I love it! He cares about his appearance so it's hard to say what I like seeing him wear the most when he always looks good! ;)

What was the most recent movie that made you cry? I haven't sat down and watched a movie lately. We went to see Date Night last night and I laughed so hard I cried. Does that count?

If you could be any age again for one week, what age would you be? Hmmmmmmm.....there are times when I miss high school and my teenage years where things seemed to be sooooo much easier. But then again, I am excited more for what the future has in store for me.

You can cast any actor now alive to play you in a film about your life. Whom would you cast in the role? It would have to be someone that could do all of my ridiculous facial expressions when I tell stories. So....who knows! Any suggestions?

If you could have one superpower, which would you choose? Time traveling. For sure.

You can choose your last meal. What will the menu consist of? Something horribly fattening and greasy.

If you had to be trapped in a TV show for a month, which show would you choose? LOST! I would never get bored, that's for sure!

If you joined the circus, what act would you most want to perform? I would probably be best at being a clown. Cause I can be both creepy and goofy at the same time if I try hard enough.

You see three teenagers making fun of a mentally handicapped man in the street. What would you do? I would probably find a very big, hard stick to smack them in the head with.

A dear friend is in agony and wants you to help him to die. Would you? That is not something I could EVVVEEERRRRRRR do. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I did.

What do you think would be the hardest thing for you to give up? Technology. Cell phone and my laptop I simply cannot live without.

Imagine it is a dark night, you are alone, it is raining outside, you hear someone walking around outside your window. Who do you call? Hopefully, I wouldn't be alone and I'd make Mac go investigate.

If you could do anything OR wish for anything that would come true, what would you wish? I don't believe in wishes! They always end up bad!

If you had only 24 hours to live, what would you do? I would have to spend it with the people that mean the most to me.

What's the worst thing about being your gender? Having a period HANDS DOWN. I was so lucky to be genetically blessed with the most vicious cramps in the universe. Thanks, mom! I usually am down for the count 1 to 2 days each month because I am in so much damn pain I can't even move.

What is the strangest dream you've ever had? When I was a kid, I was pretty obsessed with watching SNICK every Saturday night on Nickelodeon. I would watch "Are you afraid of the dark?" and it would cause me to have the most ridiculous dreams. I had a dream that someone came to my parents' house to kill me and I was shot in the stomach as soon as I opened the door. And then I became a ghost and I had to watch the killer bury all of my friends my parents landscaping in the backyard. It was all lumpy and uneven from the bodies.

Which would you choose, true love with a guarantee of a heart break or have never loved before? With true love, I really believe that there are points of heart break that you almost have to endure in order to prove that either your relationship is going to work or it isn't. Of course there are different levels of heartbreak and I am not talking about the obviously bad ones like cheating on a partner, abusing them, etc. I can't imagine not ever having loved anyone even though I have fallen in and out of the love with the wrong people at different points in my life. They were still learning experiences and they have made me the person I am today.

Think of the last time you were REALLY angry. A week and a half ago. Work really, really, really got me going.

Thursday, April 8, 2010

It really gets UNDER my skin......

I was watching an episode of the oh so wonderful television programming that MTV has to offer us. The show 16 and Pregnant was on last night and I stopped on it as I was flipping through the channels. First of all, I have HUGE issues with TV shows like this. I am not saying that I have anything against someone who has had a child as a teenager because I have a few friends that did. But my issue is more along the lines of how the topic of teen pregnancy is being presented in this show.

The episode last night was about a 16 year old girl named Leah who had been dating her boyfriend at the time (and future baby daddy) for only a month before she found out she was pregnant. I caught the episode after it had been on for about thirty minutes so the girl's twin baby girls were already born and the focus was now on the relationship between her and the father of the children and the drama between the two of them. I have issues with the fact that the show is showing these idiot girls that are horrible parents to their kids and in this girl's case, she complains constantly about how she just wants to be a teenager and go out and have fun with all of her friends. Sure she is changing their diapers and feeding them but she complains to her friends about how horrible it is and she just wishes she didn't have to do those things. The father of the twins in this case is older than her, has a job, and actually has stepped up to the responsibility of taking care of his children. Usually, you don't see the father actually wanting anything to do with the kids! So props to the guy in last night's episode for being a real daddy to his girls!

I understand that the show is trying to portray how hard it is to raise kids when you're still a kid yourself but I really don't feel that they are doing a good representation of just how much work it takes. A TV series isn't going to get it through a teenager's head that raising a baby is freaking hard to do when you can't even take care of yourself on your own. I guess it just frustrates me because I know of people who have had kids before they were ready to and I have seen first hand how hard it is for them to raise these kids. These teens don't think about the emotional impact having a child will make on them. I know that shit happens and that sometimes people get pregnant even when they take the proper precautions but geeeeeeeeeeeez. There are far too many girls in our country alone that actually think having kids at that young of an age is something that they want to do!

I am 26 years old and I am still not completely at a financially stable point in life where I could support a baby with no problem at all. I make enough money that I could do it, but there are still things I would like to have before having a baby. Like be married, get my car paid off, buy a house, etc. I can't imagine being able to plan any of these things around a child. I would obviously if I had to but I just can't imagine bringing a child into this world knowing that I am not ready for him or her to even exist.

We need to educate teens about safe sex instead of preaching to them that they should remain abstinent because we all know that is not going to happen. The resources are made readily available to these young girls so that they can take the precautions to be safe but I don't think that there is enough being done to educate them about it. Just one of the many problems with society that I know will probably NEVER get resolved but this  is something that I know I WILL teach my children about one day. 

That is my rant for the week. Thank you and good day.